Last entry.

I once fell ill, erased momentarily
The spoken word, unsavory
Empty, collapsed at my bosom
Worlds shattering at a hallow rhythm
The closet no longer haunted
Rather empty at that
and it feel genuinely awful
Tragic to be left to my devices
However macabre, truthful
To the memories that bought us here
The gap, a menace, outerly blow
Sang true, fearless and relentless
To my fears, panic, agony, free
From shackles bound, to the void
And if to my fate I was left
To it all I owe a debt, that is all.

Problematic indeed to answer
Define, explain if one will
What went wrong, what came to be
From the vision, intent, alas
We met, crossed paths and carried on
That is all.

My soul afflicted
Under duress because it knew
Once, more then one truth be told
Caress, tender love and compassion
Inflicted wounds, self-harm goes to show
Hatred produces suffering in equal amounts

Sinister spectrum
Equates to the horizon
Well traveled and predictable
At least 'till now, be honest.
Take a bite, I'll survive
To share among brethren
Blood bound , borrowed, hysterical
For we deserve, therefore we desert
In waves, round buckets of piss
For if ones cares he is foretold to meet her
The facade of regret, unblessed shade
For every single one of these friends I met
I carry the weight of their presence within me
An avalanche of investment, backwater
terrain that led into my home.

I may listen, I cannot speak
The handle is broke
Beyond repair
The gateway to salvation
A foxy little bugger
Blackout, blind to the fold
Timings sparkle conundrums
Let it be and live
Survive young one
That is all.

tristeza nao tem fim, felicidade sim

Which witch ill concern hatched nab
Tipped toed to rope me in with lullabies
Of starlight, a cosy family affair sat
Bye the by granted custody, rectified fireplace
Consents unresistable, crooked museum
Played a melancolic tune at every toilet
Spoiled myself rotten with intent burned
Flipped over coin, thophy jacks, monkey acts
Anything to get by son, his wings temporary
straight edge my laminated ass

Supress your hunger or your innocent I shall timely pierce!
Hold those hands closely to your eyes, at the blink a verge!
Delightful little one your entrapment shines down; careful!
A globe shatters at my feet, strings resonate, a handle flips!
Resolute, palms sing of betrayal, fleet beggings, reckoning!

At the mercy of gospel, the night, decorum and the irracionality
that ran deep, inside.
Decap that gun son, falling in reverse has blind sided yours truly
go soft now, outside.

What do you mean?
Glaring heartbeat overclocked
Dock those wishes under the moon
That ought to do you good
Plastic roses lay on the floor
Sticky syrum drums down
Tip drip dimes trips over
The usual suspect, a golden spark
Muscles contract, keys on ignition
devils pacts, blood worn out, I want the truth
Could swore I tried my darn hardest
did I blink twice, got scared over the sound
of bombardment, of feeling out of place

Guess I forgot my name is human
and if Life finds a way to be part
of this equation, to balance the odds
In the fight, the struggle to find it
we are one, not the same and at war
Needed time to figure it out
Getting back up from the drop
Least they come back to finish the job.

As if to a knock, I react.

Should have left that door alone
Stepped inside my dreams
A doorway, the gate leads, revolves
A natural catastrophe I chose to ignore

Noisy distractions amount to pitiful
Quakes of want, a rapture lays to waste
A state of decay, pain and everlasting gallows
Fit for king, fools and wizards. Plus the one
Whose willing, to trial through fire
Could had chosen the axe,
crossroads to the date
it had to be me.

Tempered to a shallow halo
Keeping us both sick
I speak in tongues to flare up
Curtains, walls and go the distance
Hoping they pick up meaning
To see meaning in their eyes
'Cos I don't. Make believe bite chunks
There's ever so much gut feeling alone
Can mold until the time to give it up
To own fault, recognize superhuman feat
Or ignite the man responsible, fine.

Everyone now and then
Call it a million years, invoked curve
Off a margin, silence is abandon
As if to a knock, I react.
My ears twitch, nail carved inner palms
Gone through the motions
Raise no waves, nor voices, set to wait
Chasing a dream, complete absolute darkness
The yearly mark we have came this far
Apocalyptic resolution, unfounded

Than be lost. walk out that door
Counter attack the tidal bloom
I do not believe in myself
For I stood by my queued mistakes
In distain I devoured my guts
Spitballed deformed ugly words
Best left unspoken, untold
And I do not trust the process
Of time, of getting old
Therefore I hate this day
For I do not trust old people
Nor the young, the naive
and those in love, be kind
Comprehensive extension
Conflicted mercenaries abide
To the highest bidder, sucess
Compassion for the weak
The frail, the dead and me.
A grey area to set a number
Tagged to extend a hand
To the masses, the blind
And the meek 

Escavate for pity, stroke a nerve instead
Kill
Gold digging, fool's errant, ransom fit for pirates
eyepatch irrelevant over the good eye,
walking backwards on the plank
Goodbye
Smirk as they come, capped them jolly caps
kneel and pray dreamer, entrapment for us all
Burn it to the ground, more kerozin pronto
Arms race for sore distress
and my primal sexual surge
as the rope burns, scratches and tightens
her composure stiffens and her consideration
pale and blue, maddening for I am madly,
ever so easily swayed by this violent wave
to carve the skin, brand her my own,
entirely a plaything until which my essence
is consumed, mouth links to my oblivion
I am truly lost as my hands rest at her feet.
Leave

Should the bottle tear
The compass of my morals
Exposed crystal jaw breached
Cannot afford to snap my fingers
The moment, lost, who goes there?
No signal still from up nowhere
Only bruises from knocking down walls
Bashing, trashing, clinging for dearest life
The pendulum at the bottom drawer
To the left, calibrated with blood
Shines familiar and bright
and I am always listening.