Locked the room and ate madness.

It came to be that to my first lover I never professed my favor

curator to the factions in my heart, torn and swore to never die

without vows and pleas and empty promises, none came to be

for I never spoke false truths and in silence sealed my demise.

It came to be that to my following lover I crawled and abdicated of my eccentricity

resolute in exchanging personal space for splendor and boosted hubris

drunk by the spirits of good fortune I failed to contemplate

how very high I had climbed in order to see the muse up close

Slurping body odor and loose hair down the drain

A mute agenda to feed the gators that habitat the sewers

My appointment is long overdue with a cold shower

to strip my distress, no sweat, and headbutt the wall vigorously

and yet post-confession be clean and perfumed for appearances

those can electrify even a genie and take away your heartbeat

Tremors that skip beats, forfeit or lost, so easily intertwined

I came to a stop during the interview gagging for the punchline

The connection to steal the plot and breakthrough the rhythm

This was not not what I was made to

and the piano jams another at ears reach.

_________________________________________________________________________________

Shimmery down child the dinner is turning cold

don’t ‘cha know firetraps and women are alike?

All out to entrap, snare and capture your darn hide

lick the fat off your flesh and drink the goodness off your merry bones

read off the memories out your soul and erupt in giggles starring at your penis

The novelty that preludes a joyful birth has since dried up

what past can be reconciled if my bosom weeps as a machine

ticks, vibrating eyes maroon by kin and crimson by despair

How can one be expected to love another should he the abomination

have forsaken his own mother? Each step I take on a wooden plank

creaks firmly like a old bitter friend that comes to visit once every year

awkwardness and fake laughter creases aging fingers, linking cheeks

curse alight diffusing by misdirection, ‘I am leaving now”

holding the door to take in the still breeze, terror airs find you once in a while

‘I haven’t forgotten’, I simply did not glance beneath my raised arms

trying to contain the sun, fold it twice, pray and whisper goodnight.

_________________________________________________________________________________

To truly prove that one has only not attained but also substantially

actively pursued to foment and captivate a Good Life his testimony

too must be imperial of note, restless in silent and formidable in song

terrific it should capture the imaginary and make one afraid of himself

such be the stakes at odds, the diversity of possibilities chanced at whim

stupendous adventures and gambits intertwined amidst utterly ordinary days

spent by the countryside with the spouse under a lazy summer day, partial to love

captivating romance for it is a collective endeavor, chain smoking because one can

rendezvous under the careful observation of the natural phenomena at play

and somehow that will be enough for me and you.

Lovers are faithful when they bail one another

Partner in crime, daring to an extend so and so

Bunny figure, dolled up eyes and little to no virtue

All the alternative friskiness and ever so little to lose

Hanging suspended on top of a pile of bodies

Liars, cheaters, phony folk and those that gone broke

All fitting for target practice, all worthless and thirsty

for the renewal of the life circulation to come to an end

regretful that those barely men had to swing proper

dancing on ‘dem sweets merry lips, being instructed

guided towards who they should be, impervious to distrust

The yearn for the uterus defeats the power to resist arrest

Cardiac pump jolts a zombified state unto a darker plane

one where one should address his own stench and past

Fence the ill gains hush hush, morph the coughs and whispers

an ethology of making it big, stick to the plan Sony otherwise

she will be the one who’s fertilizing my backyard

May the stars, bullets and dishonesty serve as a beacon

towards that new found religion of criminal genius in hit pursuit

you, me and the trill of being hunted, underscore the alarm of sirens

Our stagecraft the spoils of drinking straight from the fountain

despite the far-cry, fines and token tribute gifted by the audience

I do not believe the kids are gonna make it, bounty plentiful

either dead or killed, a happier accident should an immediate

decapitation over the wheel having taken a swift turn

‘whatcha say we join the club of not giving up trying

I’ll break the window and you assault the victim

deprived of his belongings, keys and dignity alike

The newspapers and experts will summarize the message

birthday boy stutters with a dislocated jaw and broken nose

worse for wear, roughed up, the mud drowned his attitude

a bitter case of premeditated messing around

Gouge the testicles, scab by scab

Perforate the eyes as you shout

“I told you so”, hangover a buffer

sobriety a sour and a pitiful listless one

a sea covered by piss and plastic tides

obscene like a coast of lab rats numerated to die

in a just order, amazed and kicking, virgin and sterile

fuck drugs that perspirate life in small increments

Spent half my life chasing the pleas
"Stay with me tonight"
and my white lies tore that hand too
not so sure that was what unbreakable stood for
more akin to under siege or unbridgeable divide,
to give nothing and therefore receive nothing
awash by cleansing fire or the palm of a lit cigarette
reconstructed experiences that I did not ask for
burden by the lapse choice of when to be a mute
fearful the day I do show emotion I wind up killing someone
What the lords that be brought me was laughter
irritating to no end, no I do not believe it to be joy
glee and merry cranks raking my peripherals

I too disturbingly contort and twist my own words
sunset uncertain, immediately a collage of lies
and that's just madness.

Your mail is a tempest in my teapot. Ever so necessary.

In took us for a whorl under the moonshine
Ankles clapped in unison, shoulders rubbed tight
Shielded from the rain by the umbrella, alas tick-tack
sobriety the nemesis, time a vigilant parent figure
Fanatic to grasp a hand and have her feed my hubris
Caress my hair, strike down my thunder whenever it may be
For all those that were once lost regain sanity through light
and if frost, be it fog in a summer desolated day, that torch
shone brighter, fair and welcoming, beaming white and true.

Your mail is a tempest in my teapot. Ever so necessary.
news that shred skin like daggers in a wolf howl respite
For more surely will follow and should you survive?
Your breath will be short and your soul hollow
Unassailable guilt would had sufficed, a mere state of mind
To dominate and creep on, like a soft souffle in a kinder palate.
Head to head one should eat oneself truly, to consume before he be taken
By the tidal wave that follows the decapitation of the relationship
To be buried upon the flag of their incapacity to retake another step forward
At least that be how I perceive romance, iconic yes.

 An on and off affair crumbled, dyed with hype and outmatched by will
The sky seemly sunless, happiness awash and empty.
To innovate now would be a survival instinct, a power-point display
presented in the nude awaiting the divine okay of my lopsided state.

Taking it personal

Today my humanity was shaken, I felt that
as the format of self harm peeled my eyelashes off
One at the time, like petals to a child's meddlesome hands
both fiend and keen, my temple shook twice still
In queer query queued at my extended palms in balm
tribute meant for the faithful, those listening and in need
That self-harm can be different for those that help without heed
no longer understating purpose, lunacy engulfing zombies asleep

My heart aches heavy still, pulsing for mere instinct and yet
We cannot discard this debt of life, nurturing its gift and
the wishing well is owned a burden that I rather forget.

If I sound dishonest it might be the signal of a tombstone
a lodestone too generates conflict, for the hands that choke
are my working tools, the very source of sustenance and pleasure
serpents that ever nifty too fall apart and ought to become necrotic
least the whole organism becomes ridden with disease sought by conflict
now it is not the time to listen to own self least it be a trap, bind your time
smitten by kinder words shallower on repeat, solace in tenuous grounds is akin
to coming to accept bad songs as a form of self-medication

Past the shifted resentment, the hollow sadness that floats
I ticked forward feeling a resemblance of saudade, I felt that.

I wish I could.

Happy ever after.

I lounge for the leap to obey gravity
The shambles under my feet to cease
To look at the godless without omission
Under no pretense or guise, to hold my breath
Smoking lungs contract ash and fearful advise.
Fending off numb cries that pale words attempt to cure
On the playground, to be drown in delirious laughter
I do wish it was possible.

Further procrastination spells disaster with a ting
Flinging aces and stars to the mark, an act of treason
Faking attention for the sake of a pompous master.
I lounged to speak only to fall quiet at a time of need
a trial I was meant to awake to, screaming for I broke the code
a promise I could not hold, I wish it would not cast a shadow.

a man so simple, treatable and kind
Earned his keep, a rightful place in the kingdom
Of man, the divine and all things true.
Alongside peers, loved ones and enemies
For peace comes all but at once and everlasting.

If Life starts now where am I been thus far?
Where do you intend to hide the shuck off me?

Do not return me there
the very edge of the World
is all but flat in substance
Tasteless it fails to entertain
a positive car crash
Anonymous reasoning
Push, pull, swing, take and oops,
Phone call terminated.

Courtesy of seeing the wrong way.

I saw a fellow breather riddled with passion
Basking in the stream of sound, singing for hella'
Tad preachy on the peacekeeping ways,
busking for bread and admiration
"Sugar we are not made to break, surely?
Let's us resolve this friendly fire in common grounds
let my children be the last ones to die, flying down now
with angels and the Divine, innocent still, missed and loved all the same."

No matter how many times I pump my own empty chest
The desired response stood timid leaving my mind cloudy
Gratitude can be freaky and mankind can be stripped of her beauty
Starring down a well of infectious deadly mold
We hanged a poet for his preposterous arrogance yesterday,
for his love for the word was both powerful and penetrating
made my skin curl, trying to retreat to the guiltless womb,
now it is the rotten bones that need rescue. Fantasize outrage,
cannot mellow the irony of the rope, messy if I say so myself.

I shine like polished fool's gold in the candlelight
Nothing a smokers spit cannot dissolve.
Locked in a room with restless specters,
all but one wish me harm, tolerating my presence
Nevertheless, the Sun bathes the wicked all the same

This pins in my ears, round my lips and encased on my skin
are but a faint warning sealing away forgiveness and meaning
for all I paint is vain, all I dare sing off beat and deafening,
for all I write spells trouble and sounds cross and petty
Do you ever feel nauseated, the surroundings strange and distant?
The constellations drive a hard bargain to salute your path to familiar grounds
It has been hours and your heart is still restless
Wondering if you ever are gonna relearn how to pace yourself
Will the tick tock ever slow down.

A phantom lays low underneath your ear.

Body sweat can cure jealousy, petrify demons
eat away the apple of my eye and looking back
I drank 'till I believed in roller coasters leading to God

The venom of diving down the hatch of affirmative response
Why yes sir I choke gracefully, do note the needle and remember
Chopping fingers can lead to decomposition, got it memorized?

Warfare mimics a getaway of a lab rat greater wall banging
Chopped teeth experience the regurgitate a fragrance of decay
Tensions wasteful at a glance, motherfuckers be on the offense

Some questions do not fulfill their purpose, eating away at curiosity
Did my unborn twin earned a proper burial under the divine veil?
Is he floating in the wind, set off in adventure towards ours truly

might just be a dreadful waste of time 'innit?
a vigilant outlook true, snooping around and listening
picking up clues like a cannibal scavenges for corpses
too feeble to kill, not quite desperate enough to bite the hand
In order to feed I swear I would do many a despicably things
but sleaziness will prevail, not to fears disadvantage ahah
It is very much so present, in mild dosage, makeup of my being
A phantom lays low underneath your ear, those halls of perdition
Should thy words string erratically one can do away with thy tongue;

I find my saga is all but lost, all too driven to pick up speed towards the window
I am but a fiend whose hands crave response, whose flesh is coarse and bitter
a desk slamming demon that grew up chasing voices in the rain, misspelled and all
dispel this curse, anyone, and I raise my chest in disbelief if it were not my lies
that sabotaged my destiny, lock-downed my memory to a fermented mess of shit

and I swear, oh yes I swear the reason I conduct myself in faint melancholic
nonetheless, easily identifiable hand flowing monologue is to pay tribute to hope'
 
to jump the wall and land fairly well in appropriate sing-along, should she be listening.

Black and blue knew them well.

Black be the sun, two folded, in savant request
Blue a gentler eccentric song worthy of pen and drippy blood
Thine a conundrum empiric to melodrama
Wound ac rooked device holistic
Hands torn, aching sores, fail to capture hot air streaming off
a rusty scream for liberty that's not quite there
They can, however, rope your throat and interrupt your living state
assault your senses, now roused of chance, off it;s divine lung capacity
Deserted of a tapped conscious, both murder and minuscule prisoner
a lab rat, one battered black and blue, his boyhood emancipated and stripped down
forcefully and certain, immediate and everlasting, never liked him anyway.

The pen, black ink, black casing, black problematic hands profess
a criminal confession, a bluish hurrah spun in a shared dream
Tolerable yet unwarranted eyelashes slip through, nuisance, lashes... yes?
hundred folded unto his skin, prized for conduct, cherished for the lesson bent
Black be the taint charred unto the soul
in coarse blue bruised skies as she cries
Negro tones of affliction unplanned, untold, gave way for you
Off the book a fuming solution tastes of iron
Crux be thy rod, scarlet agony, beaming rope in late compromise
Custom made, to measure and customary enough. Practical and final.
As you feel the neck break under the weight, judgement is passed.